About The Authors The Motley Crew

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Kim Burnham ("Big Ben") is married to the best life form on the planet, who raised three children that are all smarter and more talented than their parents. Kim is a Microbiology professor at Oklahoma State University and currently a Mormon Bishop. So far, writing has netted him ten dollars. But it sure is fun. E-mail: burnyd@yahoo.com.


Michael Barnett ("Savior") considers himself to be a "defrocked" astrophysicist, having graduated with degrees in physics and astronomy. In order to live, he took a job as a software engineer and has been at it since 1979. He used to write to help himself out during times of depression. Interestingly enough, his life has apparently been good for the last fifteen years. Of course, having a family with two small children does make it slightly difficult to keep up with any literary pursuits. Even so, Michael has been bitten by the Muse once again. Michael has been electronically published in "The Cat's Eye", a defunct e-zine, with a story entitled "Toll Road." His Web site has more of his writing, including juvenile science fiction, astronomical non-fiction, and religious humor pieces at http://www.geocities.com/CapeCanaveral/9634. E-Mail: michaelbarnett@hotmail.com

Mila Burton ("Hypnagougue") was born in the mid-70s to Canadian parents and has adapted well to life in Dallas, Texas, having been born there. An avid smoker and recovering Catholic, Mila's activities include: drinking coffee, eating read meat, driving at obceane speeds, and conspiring against the yuppies with her husband. She does not write science fiction exclusivly; it's just that authors like Ray Bradbury and Philip K. Dick have been her greatest influences. She believes that science fiction should use the science to tell the story and you don't have to have five apostrophes in your name to be an alien. E-mail: mila18@hotmail.com . Web: http://members.tripod.com/~mila18

Gary Campbell ("The Visitor")is 51 years old, married, the father of four, and lives in the Midwest (Illinois). He served 8 years in the military (Navy and Marines), three tours in Viet Nam (Electronic Warfare and Intelligence), and currently works as an Aerosoace Engineer. Gary like to wargame and write SF in his spare time. E-Mail: GJC@mail.rkd.snds.com

Ron Carnell ("Tormented Love") is a poet. rcarnell@voyager.net

Tony Chandler ("Steel Stallions") lives in Atlanta, Ga., where spring is sprung. Woohoo. He is proud that he is sharing this issue of Planet with his sister, Ginger! Tony's online novel comes out June 1st, through September, at Little Read Writer's Hood http://www.summit.net/writers_hood/htms/genre.htm. If you like adventure, and Tony knows you do, please give it a read. And he will have more adventures for Planet, real soon. E-mail: Thunderstar5@yahoo.com

Virginia Chandler ("Ristro") is a technical writer who has been published in "Golf" magazine, "Divot" magazine, "Lost Worlds" (twice), "Database Advisor," and "Lotus Notes Advisor," and she has a novel available online from Cloverleaf Golf publishers, "Solid Contact". E-mail: DragnHawk@aol.com

Chris Clagg ("Remembrances") works, reads, writes, and occasionally sleeps in Orlando, Florida. A day job working in Retail Sales as well as teaching computer science for a local elementary school hinder his creative efforts, but have no effect at all on his book-a-week reading habit. He dreams of (a) cracking the commercial market, (b) winning the lottery, (c) travelling to other worlds and times, and (d) not necessarily all of those in the same order or all at once. E-mail: claggc@bellsouth.net

Ray Dangel (Associate Editor) is a refugee who favors bright-blue denims inspired by the kilometer-high sapphire towers of Venus. He hitched a ride to Earth with a Viking (no, not the spacecraft, one of the Scandinavian barbarians who developed row-boats capable of space travel back in the 8th Century). Ray brought a portable time machine with him, and last weekend he spent 32 years panning for gold in Australia. He found only one ounce of color, but came back with a terrific tan. He now is green instead of blue. Before joining the overpaid Planet staff, Ray worked a number of years in newspapering, which accounts for the ink in his veins and the think in his brains. Among his many hobbies, Ray enjoys toying with humans by programming subliminal messages into everyday items. Under the proper conditions, his picture can be seen in the holographic images found on most major credit cards. E-mail: radangel@eazy.net.

Romeo A. Esparrago, Jr. (Issue Web Designer; Art Schmoozer; "Doublet") spent so much time licking the pretty colors on his screen that his tongue mutated into its own life form, ripped itself out of his mouth, and headed into the ocean. It was last seen attempting to mate with a nuclear submarine under the Arctic ice sheet. Now mute, Romeo lets his wife do all the talking to their new Pug puppy baby. E-mail: Ihabmogung@tongueless.com. Web: http://www.romedome.com/.

James Heflin ("Remote"), though Texan, lives in Montague, Massachusetts, where he plays rock-and-roll in Fatter Than Elvis and Down All the Days. He has published poetry and fiction, and is currently working on an unauthorized biography of Ronald J. Feldman, the inventor of the Chip Clip and the less successful Dip Clip. His forehead is extremely shiny. He makes a mean gumbo. E-mail: jheflin@english.umass.edu.

J.W. Kurilec's ("Reasonable Man") science fiction and fantasy stories have also have appeared in "E-Scape" and "Intertext." E-mail: jwkurilec@bigfoot.com Home page: http://www.bigfoot.com/~jwkurilec

[Removed at author's request] ("")

Michael Martineck ("Flittering Headstones") lives on an island in upstate New York where he converts coffee and complex sugars into science fiction. DC Comics has purchased a few stories from Michael, and he received an honorable mention in 1997's Hewlett-Parkard Writing Contest. This year, Geneses Publishing chose him as its first featured author. His novel "Eidolon Ground" is available at http://www.geneses.com/. E-mail: mjmartineck@mailexcite.com

Andrew G. McCann (Big Cheese, "Fugitive", Editorial & Fake Letters, artwork for "Hot Line" and "Tormented Love") is a metallic-puce, vaguely artichoke-sized creature capable only of moving sideways on tiny pincers while staring expressionlessly. It's all so unfair. To compensate for this, Andy works as a body-art daredevil in Brooklyn, New York. His final stunt of the 20th Century will be the piercing of his cranial carapace with a nut-rolled cheese log live on pay-per-view TV on New Year's Eve, 1999. For completeness' sake, he will repeat this feat on New Year's Eve, 2000. E-mail: abomination_from_the_tiny_sea@blackgodskiss.com.

Kevin James Miller ("Mrs. Selby Takes a Lover From Another Galaxy") has been a carnival ride operator, a customer service phone representative, a children's petting zoo guide, a door-to-door salesman, a film student, and a factory worker. Some time during the '90's, he got it into his head that he wanted to teach children professionally. Kevin started to go to Graduate school for that purpose, but flunked out of its how-to-teach-K-to-12 program. (Something nobody else had ever managed to do before.) Since the school still wanted his money, he was urged to switch majors, which he did, to "Written Communication," the twenty-dollar way of saying "writing," because he always had a serious interest in books and an amateur's interest in writing. Kevin got fired up about the possibilities of creating his own fiction as a serious pursuit after taking a course in American fiction at that school taught by a gay Protestant minister. Kevin settled generally on science fiction, fantasy, and horror, because that's the way his imagination tends to go. He's currently teaching freshman and sophomore composition at an undergraduate school. E-mail: kjamesmiller@juno.com

Aidan O'Keefe ("Reading Upstream") is the pen name of John Cameron Suart, who lives outside Fredericton, New Brunswick, on Canada's East Coast. A former journalist turned advertising executive, he has written for a number of Canadian and U.S. newspapers and magazines. He also spent several years in broadcasting working as a radio reporter and announcer. Suart's love of science fiction started at an early age and continues to this day. He started writing science fiction himself two years ago. "Reading Upstream" was his first completed work. He continues to write short stories when he isn't working up advertising campaigns or being a full-time dad and husband. E-mail for Aidan O'Keefe (John Cameron Suart): suart@nbnet.nb.ca

L. Theodore Ollier ("Negligence") began writing at an early age (5) and for several years covered reams of typing paper and stacks of legal pads with space operas lifted from "Star Trek," "Star Wars," "Tom Swift," and the writings of such authors as Asimov and Heinlein. With the advent of the PC, Mr. Ollier was freed of the tyranny of paper (not to mention writer's cramp) and soon developed a style more-or-less his own. His interests range from speculative future histories, hard "science" fiction, near-future alternities, para-planetary cartography, and non-Tolkienesque, non-medieval fantasy (which may or may not be a contradiction in terms). Currently he has stacks of well-written, interesting short stories and one thought-provoking young-adult novel with a corresponding stack of terse rejection slips. Mr. Ollier is in his late twenties, has one two-year-old dog, and lives in Austin, Texas. E-mail: elthiol@outer.net

Hathno Paige ("Space Monkey King") is the spiritual leader of the Kinaca Kult, whose adherents believe that habitual use of Kinaca Breath Spray can lead to enlightenment. He is unwired.

James M. Palmer ("A.I.") is a 25-year-old Middle Grades Education major, concentrating in English and Social Studies, but what he really wants to do is write full time and make lots of money! He enjoys spending time with his fiance, writing short stories, and writing articles and a monthly column called Random Musings for both his Web site and The Outer Rim, the newspaper of the Area 51 community of Geocities. His tentative long-term project is a book about SF fandom. E-Mail: grendel2@bellsouth.net

Frederick Rustam ("The Monk Who Hated Latin") is a retired civil servant who formerly indexed technical reports for the Department of Defense. He writes science fiction for the Web as a hobby. He prefers devising imaginary worlds to dealing with the technological complexities of the current one. E-mail: frustam@CapAccess.org.

Will Sand ("Timing") is a retired chiropractor living on the central coast of California. He has been published in Aberrations, Ultimate Unknown, and online (Dark Planet, Twilight Times, Exodus, Blue Pages, Antipodean, and Ibn Qirtaiba). His body is as old as the current President and his vision as current as the new millennium. Home page: http://www.redshift.com/~wsandtt/

Scott Speck-Lesh ("Planet X") been been published in five e-zines: Planet Magazine, Juicy Britches, Wired Art for Wired Hearts, the ShallowEND, and The Writer's Choice. He is 35 years old and works full time as a software systems engineer with the Hubble Space Telescope project. He participates in two electronic workshops and an on-campus workshops at the Johns Hopkins University. His poetry, short stories, and novels focus on nature, politics, religion, erotica, and human relationships. E-mail: speck@erols.com

Bill Vernon ("Hot Line") was booted into retirement from his long-time teaching job, and in revenge is wreaking havoc on his keyboard. Occasional politically incorrect rampages emerge, threatening to doom the few interpersonal communications he achieves. So he apologizes in advance should insensitivity occur. More often he waxes poetically acceptable, as may be seen online in "The Animist," "A Writer's Choice Literary Magazine," "Seeker Magazine," and "New Works Review." Writing about himself in the third person and depicting himself as a woman in his fiction are becoming worrisome habits. E-mail: Verwill@aol.com.

Tom Wagner (Associate Editor/Key Grip; "Exterminator, First Class") is the half-plant/half-human ruler and sole inhabitant of Angri-La-La, a destroyed city in a volcano somewhere east of Krakatoa. Tom's non-desire for a life of no desiring is continually upset by the unpredictable hijinks of a band of rogue monkeys, namely, Endi, Rey, Rummio, and Shemp. In fact, one time, this zany group of monkeys... no, no, we can't go into it here; it's too long a story, and you'd simply never believe it! E-mail: thomas_p_wagner@hotmail.com.





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For Sale: One Editor's Personality -- never used. If new, would cost over $12. This is the latest version. Takes up only 4k. Windows 2000-ready; Linux upgrade available; Palm V-compatible. iMac version "coming soon." Reason for selling: Apparently not needed; anyway, adding a personality layer only slows down processing time for Planet's Editor-Unit. E-mail: DamagedSheepClone@planetmag.com.